And you’re not going to want to miss out on the relationship advice she graciously shared with us.
And in Austria, healing and supporting people essentially means you become either a doctor or psychologist.
So that’s how I entered into the world of what I’m doing now.
Yeah, it’s a lot.
Fifty weeks a year for many years.
So that’s why my approach is essentially very, very practical.
Boehm compares learning new relationship skills to learning a sport
Yeah.
To me personally, they’re all one skill set.
It follows the same principles that can be sliced different ways.
Sex, of course, makes things much more interesting and much more complicated.
How is that something that we can practice?
I mean, how do we perfect these skills as if, as if it’s a sport?
Which is quite nonsensical when you look at it as skill development.
Nobody would expect you to be a virgin of golf and play the masters.
That just would never happen.
We don’t actually have a repetitive habit-forming skill development in sex.
How can one become proficient in relationships?
Like you said, you’re not going to be great at it at the beginning.
Would you agree with that?
So I think similar to golf once again, right?
Not much more complicated … And the same is true with good relationships.
On one end, I agree with you [about] that.
How do we learn about what we want in relationships and what’s good?
We do it, we fail, we stumble, we adjust, and we get better.
Then when then you are compromised in your ability to do the best in a relationship.
And so it’s good if you want to become a golf legend.
Instead of habitually repeating things that become habits that are actually not good for you.
Don’t fret if the spark is gone, advises Boehm
Right?
Well, thank you for explaining it like that.
I think that makes a lot of sense.
And what’s something that you wish people understood more about your job and what you do?
And it’s actually, and this is really a bit controversial to say, right?
It is actually a sign of the relationship progressing positively.
Sometimes a relationship degrades and goes away, right?
But in a healthy, normal way that people develop, they get a certain kind of a closeness.
Because sexual attraction is built on opposition, right?
But all the things that make your relationship deeper don’t necessarily make the sex more exciting.
And then the next step would be to actually deepen the sexual engagement.
Now we’re intimate, now we’re connected.
And so, or they get resentful and they start nagging and things like that.
And it’s also not the moment to just get complacent.
It’s the moment where you have the opportunity to really deepen your relationship on a whole other level.
Michaela Boehm has known and been friends with Gwyneth Paltrow for years
That’s excellent.
Are you surprised that your career has brought you to being on TV and working with Gwyneth Paltrow?
Does that surprise you?
That’s a really good question.
I would say yes and no.
I would say yes, because, of course, I’ve been doing this for over 25 years.
So I come at it from a place where there wasn’t any social media or not much.
Streaming services, of course, weren’t available or things like that.
So I certainly didn’t set out to be on TV.
And so it is quite interesting to see how that happened.
My entire life is in this, and it’s incredibly important to me.
There’s a certain kind of, ah, yes, that’s right.
I want to bring it out into the world very strongly because I feel very passionate about it.
I think that’s excellent.
What has the experience working with Gwyneth Paltrow been like for you?
And so to me that felt like [an] honor.
I felt very honored to be able to do that.
And she does in a different way.
And so it was very, just very beautiful.
And seeing it was really, really amazing.
I felt very, just very happy about having been able to do that.
And was there anything that was surprising to you about working with her?
No, I wouldn’t say surprising.
Just more it’s always incredibly beautiful when people step in so fully, right?
And give it their very all and are that committed.
Are there any couples that stand out for you?
Because personally I love Felicitas and Rama.
I just loved their whole relationship and their dynamic.
What stands out for you as memorable?
And their willingness to go really uncomfortable places …
I would fall in love with them.
They’re hard not to fall in love with like instantly.
I know, isn’t it?
Well, that is the thing.
And that’s true for a lot of people.
I mean, getting help is … there’s still a stigma about that.
In a certain way.
Michaela Boehm leaves us with her best love and relationship advice
I totally agree.
And if you could leave our readers with your best advice, what would you say?
And that is, I think the malaise of a lot of things, right?
And the strength, I guess, to be able to articulate that definitely is a very specific skill.
And it’s a very learnable skill.
Everybody can learn how to.
Everybody can find out what they like, what they don’t like, and how to articulate it.
“Sex, Love & goop” is available on Netflix.
